Archived posting to the Leica Users Group, 2003/03/10

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Subject: Re: [Leica] O.T. baby photographer joke
From: "animal" <s.jessurun95@chello.nl>
Date: Tue, 11 Mar 2003 08:31:35 +0100
References: <200303102042.MAA16392@mejac.palo-alto.ca.us> <004c01c2e778$72cca060$3500a8c0@cc222286a>

thanks
simon
- ----- Original Message -----
From: "Paul Winkfield" <pwink@bellatlantic.net>
To: <leica-users@mejac.palo-alto.ca.us>
Sent: Tuesday, March 11, 2003 3:46 AM
Subject: [Leica] O.T. baby photographer joke


> Hi All,
>
> I figure it's time for a joke...If you read it before, have another laugh!
> Remember, do not take life too seriously, cuz no body gets out alive!
> (credit: Buggs Bunny)
>
> Subject: Baby photographer
> >
> >The Smiths were unable to conceive children, and
> >elected to use a surrogate father to start their family.
> >
> >On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith
> >kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be
> >here soon."
> >
> >Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door
> >baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a
> >sale.
> >
> >"Good morning madam. I've come to..."
> >
> >"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you,"
> >Mrs. Smith cut in.
> >
> >"Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good! I've
> >made a specialty of babies."
> >
> >"That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come
> >in and have a seat."
> >
> >After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we
> >start?"
> >
> >"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the
> >bathtub, one on the couch and perhaps a couple
> >on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is fun
> >too; you can really spread out!"
> >
> >"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work
> >for Harry and me."
> >
> >"Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one
> >every time. But if we try several different positions
> >and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll
> >be pleased with the results."
> >
> >"My, that's a lot of. . . " gasped Mrs. Smith.
> >
> >"Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time.
> >I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but you'd
> >be disappointed with that, I'm sure."
> >
> >"Don't I know it," Mrs. Smith said quietly.
> >
> >The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a
> >portfolio of his baby pictures.
> >"This was done on the top of a bus in downtown
> >London."
> >
> >"Oh my God!!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her
> >handkerchief.
> >
> >"And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when
> >you consider their mother was so difficult to work
> >with."
> >
> >"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.
> >
> >"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde
> >Park to get the job done right. People were crowding
> >around four and five deep, pushing to get a good
> >look."
> >
> >"Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened
> >in amazement.
> >
> >"Yes", the photographer said. "And for more than three
> >hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and
> >yelling - I could hardly concentrate. Then darkness
> >approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when
> >the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just
> >packed it all in."
> >
> >Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean they actually
> >chewed on your, um...equipment?"
> >
> >"That's right. Well, madam, if you're ready, I'll set
> >up my tripod so that we can get to work."
> >
> >"Tripod?"
> >
> >"Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on.
> >It's much too big for me to hold very long.
> >Madam? Madam?...Good Lord, she's fainted
> >
> >
>
>
>
>
> ---
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In reply to: Message from "Paul Winkfield" <pwink@bellatlantic.net> ([Leica] O.T. baby photographer joke)