[Leica] Must I solve all of Ted Grant's Problems?

[tedgrant at shaw.ca (Ted Grant)]

Kyle Cassidy offered a non-violent solution: ;-)
Subject: [Leica] Must I solve all of Ted Grant's Problems?


>>>>Ted's Problem: Deer keep eating his flowers and since he's Canadian --  
>>>>and doesn't have a violent bone in his body and won't kill them and dry 
>>>>them out for jerky-- they do it over and over.<<<

>>>Ted's Solution: Photograph the deer every night as they mosey about in 
>>>your back yard.<<<<<<<<<,

But Kyle they're so damn brazen they do it right at high noon! Or anytime 
they feel like eating.

>>>>Send the staggeringly awesome photos to Outdoor Life, Field and Stream, 
>>>>and whatever other magazines of that ilk publish them.<<<<

But then I'd have a hoard of those damn pappy-ratzzie creatures exposing 
themselves over the fence. Then the human and animal rights people would 
hold a demonstration on the front lawn because I was allowing "flashers" to 
spook the dear, deer, while interruptring their feeding time! :-(

Eventually the Red Coats would ride up on their horses and declare me non- 
human-persona gratis tying my hands behind my back dragging me to the Beaver 
dug-out jail left after they'd de-pelted the beaver for their Red fur coats.

>>>Take the $$$ (or whatever silly imitation of American dollars they use in 
>>>Canada -- beads or shells<<<

Actually metal shell casings! We pound back into trinkets then sell to the 
tourists!;-)  Beaver pelts smell really bad when it gets warm, around -40 
below in July! ;-)

>>>and hire some guy to sit in the back yard and feed the deer corn and 
>>>Vegemite and Purena Deer Chow. They will become so fat and satiated that 
>>>they will leave his flowers alone.<<<<

We tried that, but all that did was bring a different kind of "shooter." The 
kind with those funny furry hats with a big tail down the bag and automatic 
weapons! ;-)
I mean sometimes it's wild around here with bullets and deer guts flying all 
over the place. I don't know what's worse, those automatic carrying guys I 
saw in yer book or the damn deer eating the flowers? ;-)

>>>Another good deed done, I can now go to sleep.<<<

You do that and thanks for the suggestion. :-)

 Oh by the way while yer touring yer countryside looking fer them guys and 
gals with their neat looking, although scary guns, sell them the location 
where they 'kin git lots of deermeat fer a fee and a tour of backwards north 
country.

If they go fer it, send half of what you git, I can come visit and we'll 
have fun shootin' deer in yer back yard! ;-)

Yer northern cusin,
Edwardo,
 AKA -- ted the Terrible! :-)