Archived posting to the Leica Users Group, 2012/06/01

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Subject: [Leica] MARRIAGE / Reorganizing my equipment collection
From: mark at whitedogs.co.uk (Mark Pope)
Date: Fri, 01 Jun 2012 16:45:58 +0100
References: <CABXy406JBEQxq4Nx1LHLZMp1Ce-GLw52gSQ1q_za-zRdpYte9Q@mail.gmail.com> <CBEC08D7.15844%chris@chriscrawfordphoto.com> <CA+yJO1DbWqZUP1ju_Xs6ydtGVat_v0Zu9F4teS7stQ2N3UYVOQ@mail.gmail.com> <BLU139-DS54AD58F1E37B327C11127B80B0@phx.gbl> <081DA5E707A442AFA2158A1B1BA46917@syneticfeba505> <7BA8BD50-F92D-421C-A39A-032CECE5A823@btinternet.com>

100% agreement here too. I'm a mere youngster.  It's 29 years for us and 
not a day goes by where I don't count my blessings and there aren't many 
days when we don't have a laugh together.

How many people actually listen to what they are committing to when the 
stand up in a church or registry office and make their vows?  If they 
did, I wonder how many would actually go through with getting married?

My father in law nursed his wife who had suffered a stroke and had 
Alzheimers until it literally wore him out.  He told me he took a vow to 
look after Pearl in sickness and in health and that's what he did.

Personally, I think what's gone wrong for many these days (does that 
make me sound
old?) is that so many people expect to have everything right now.  The
house, new car, brand new appliances, the whole nine yards.  These
things matter more than the vows - loving an cherishing the latest
I-thing rather than each other...Marriage isn't a glossy magazine.

We had hand-me-down furniture for years.  We bought our first colour TV 
because Karin wanted to watch Torville and Dean winning the Ice Dancing 
at the 1984 Winter Olympics.  Before that, we used a B&W portable TV 
that I had for my 18th birthday.  We didn't have a car for the first 
five years and then we only bought one because I needed it for my new job.

The most important day in the year for me is our wedding anniversary. 
Birthdays, Christmas and everything else just pales into insignificance.



Mark Pope,
Swindon, Wilts
UK

Homepage               http://www.monomagic.co.uk
Blog                   http://www.monomagic.co.uk/blog
Picture a week (2012)  http://www.monomagic.co.uk/index.php?gallery=paw/2012
Picture a week (2010)  http://www.monomagic.co.uk/index.php?gallery=paw/2010
Picture a week (2009)  http://www.monomagic.co.uk/index.php?gallery=paw/2009
                (2008) 
http://www.monomagic.co.uk/index.php?gallery=paw/2008

On 01/06/2012 10:38, Frank Dernie wrote:
> Spot on Ted. I have been married to my best friend for 38 years. We
> have 4 children who have all been a joy since they were born, and we
> are anticipating the birth of our sixth grandchild at the moment. The
> five we already have being the lights of our lives now our children
> are grown up! We have our differences, and "robust" discussions from
> time to time, but that is to deal with. I suspect people have a
> somewhat inflexible view of how their mate should be and/or think
> they can change them. If I have learned one thing it is to accept
> that you can't change them, and its an arrogance to believe you
> could/should.
>
> I feel for your loss, Ted, goodness knows how I will deal with it
> when our time comes.
>
> Frank
>
> On 31 May, 2012, at 20:34,<tedgrant at shaw.ca>  <tedgrant at shaw.ca>
> wrote:
>
>> As much as this hurts I have to put my 2 pennies worth of opinion
>> on long-time marriage! Given I just experienced 63 years of a very
>> lovingly interesting and satisfying married life before my dear
>> Irene passed on. :-(
>>
>> If in the beginning you marry a good woman or good man
>> understanding it's not going to be a bed of roses and there maybe
>> in that bed of roses a few "pricks" along the way. That you are
>> prepared to have the odd straining moments of communication, both
>> heated and as lovingly as it can possibly be. To admit, you as the
>> male are prepared to accept you "ARE WRONG AND SHE IS RIGHT!" And
>> vise versa! It's a two way street always! Give and take, get over
>> it and move on together still enjoying the wonderful feeling of her
>> or he cuddled by your side anytime .
>>
>> If you are properly matched? Obviously understood right from the
>> first time you find her cuddled by your side in the warmth of the
>> night. There isn't any reason for a pennies worth of thought about
>> divorce. I see divorcing when children have been conceived as one
>> of the most cruel things parents can bestowe on their off spring.
>> Having not done that, I'm sure there are other opinions.
>>
>> By the same token today's society is a wrangle of perceived
>> "entitlement beyond common sense" where "NO" is the only so called
>> correcting answer to everything. "No you can't do that, this and
>> every stupid asinine reason to turn the society into some quagmire
>> of stupid ill-conceived rules, laws and regulations."
>>
>> But if you have the right woman or male by your side in the
>> beginning, none of the garbage-pit regulations conceived by moronic
>> politicians and government bureaucrats will deter you one iota from
>> a beautiful long and enjoyable life with the mate you've loved
>> beyond your wildest dreams and thoughts when you first said "I
>> Do!"
>>
>> I find the "bitterness shown here" by some extremely unfortunate
>> for the so called "Victim!" But one must ask ..... "What happened
>> to the "two way street of give and take?" Stubbornness of stupidity
>> by both doesn't solve anything.
>>
>> The "Whores of Hollywood" and societies of today's lust for all the
>> crap stuff promoted in crappy celebrity magazines that cater to the
>> witless fools who see the events of Hollywood as... "They do, so I
>> do!"  It is this kind of crap the completely innocent women and men
>> in the first place, see divorce is the only answer. Then do it and
>> the next thing you know they've grab another foolish male or female
>> ready to wed. They do it as quickly and as fast "as a Saturday
>> night whore changing her undies!" And all they've done is move them
>> selves into another quagmire that ends again in divorce.
>>
>> I'm sorry but I don't by all this bull-shit about divorce being the
>> be-all answer to solving marital problems. Sure there are going to
>> be the exception simply because if the wrong mate was picked
>> because she or he was a "WOW FACTOR IN THE SACK!" That only helps
>> on cold winter nights, but that's only a part of a successful
>> marriage.
>>
>> I need not go on any longer as I know my married life was great,
>> sure we had some wild old verbal battles. Everybody does at
>> sometime or other and anyone saying they never had a squabble is
>> probably lying. That's all part of Mother Natures Communications in
>> working things out. After all it is a two way street of give and
>> take.
>>
>> Unfortunately nobody was around with a Leica to photograph some of
>> our "discussions?" ;-) Oscar martial for the cover of LIFE
>> magazine! ;-)
>>
>> Bottom-line? We loved each other, enjoyed our great times together,
>> had 4 great and wonderful successful children. And now 10 Grand
>> children who are also cracker jack kids and the oldest two will own
>> their own business operations one of these days as they're already
>> laying out plans and how. 20&  21!
>>
>> All a hell of a lot brighter than their grandfather when it comes
>> to the "Art of running a business." OH yeah and both have wonderful
>> sharp ladies by their sides.
>>
>> So there you go eh! I just wish it were 63 years and counting! :-(
>> I miss her dearly. :-(
>>
>> cheers, ted
>>
>>
>>
>> _______________________________________________ Leica Users Group.
>> See http://leica-users.org/mailman/listinfo/lug for more
>> information
>
>
> _______________________________________________ Leica Users Group.
> See http://leica-users.org/mailman/listinfo/lug for more information


In reply to: Message from ken at iisaka.com (Ken Iisaka) ([Leica] Reorganizing my equipment collection)
Message from chris at chriscrawfordphoto.com (Chris Crawford) ([Leica] Reorganizing my equipment collection)
Message from images at comporium.net (Tina Manley) ([Leica] Reorganizing my equipment collection)
Message from leica_r8 at hotmail.com (Aram Langhans) ([Leica] Reorganizing my equipment collection)
Message from tedgrant at shaw.ca (tedgrant at shaw.ca) ([Leica] MARRIAGE / Reorganizing my equipment collection)
Message from Frank.Dernie at btinternet.com (Frank Dernie) ([Leica] MARRIAGE / Reorganizing my equipment collection)